Day 50 of Quarantine

So I’ve been having a lot of ups lately, and this is thanks to the books I’m reading, the shows I’m watching, the artists I adore, and my readers who keep on cheering me up.

Weight Loss

I’ve been eating egg and tuna for more than a month.

I love cheat days because it’ll be the only time I can order from Army Navy and Bacsilog, the only two food establishments that can deliver in our area. May Jollibee and McDo naman, but I avoid deep-fried foods as much as possible.

And because of my editing work, nasira exercise routine ko. I’ll be back on it tomorrow. It has been two weeks!

But still, even without exercise, I lost a kilo or so. I started 65 kilograms, overweight and weak. I have a lot of health issues a year ago (it’s almost a year na pala!) But now I’m 50 kilograms. Proud lang ako because I was able to discipline myself. Although bumabalik na naman ang unhealthy routine ko because of the anxiety that this quarantine is causing me. Still, kapit lang to my promise last year: “No matter the time, no matter the day, I can always start fresh. Start your change now.”

Challenging Textbook Editing Work

I’m 95% done with the textbook I’m editing. Hay. I am only supposed to look at the content and the language used, but I can’t stop myself from analyzing the pedagogical methods as well. Grade 1 pa lang sila. They don’t know the words accountability and rain gauge yet. They’ll be having science in grade 3, so why put rain gauge and wind vane in a grade 1 textbook? How to answer WH questions are tackled in grade 2, so they can’t basically answer why and how questions yet. One activity even asked the pupils to go house to house. These are things that authors tend to overlook, and it’s my work as a developmental, content, and language editor to ensure the book is appropriate for grade 1 learners. Kaya mas gusto ko ang tumingin ng junior and senior high textbooks, e. I had to go back and forth from kinder to grade 1 to grade 2 curricula just so I’m sure that the content they’re discussing is grade 1 appropriate.

Nakaka-stress, but I love my work. Editing plus education plus writing. A win-win for me. Nga lang, the frustrating part really comes after I submitted this. Most authors would ignore the comments and return it to me with “We don’t have time to edit this anymore.”

Readers’ Kalat

I follow readers on Twitter. Sa kanila ko nakukuha ang mga susunod kong babasahin. I realize how powerful feedback and recommendations are, at na opposite pala ako ng most Xvisionists (hahaha) who reads whatever is there. Ako naman, I heavily rely on recommendations.

I have a reader who creates threads of what she reads, and I read them one by one. Interesting lang to know what parts they find interesting in the novel they’re reading.

Also, natutuwa ako sa kalat nila. I need that in my life, I guess. Haha. Kasi I’ve been working from home for two or so years already, and their kalat tweets entertain me.

Wattpad Novels and Published Books

Sabi ko, isa-isa lang kasi ang dami kong gustong basahin. I want to read an ongoing novel and a published book one at a time. Currently, I’m reading Reaching Through on Wattpad. It’s about a male college student liking another student of the same sex. What intrigued me, though, is its religious parts. As many may already know, I am not part of any religious group anymore. But these readings keep my mind open. Natutuwa ako kasi I find myself arguing with the character. I wonder how the author (hi, Zyron) plans to take this.

Abangers din ako sa Novel ni Jhing Bautista na The Fall of Icarus. I remember I was super down when she published it. It was my saving grace. I think it was around July last year when she published it, tama ba? Ang tagal na pala. Haha! But the first chapters really stuck to me, kaya when she announced that she was coming back, napa-comment ako, in all caps.

Sa published, I’m reading Field Guide: Love and Other Natural Disasters by Six de los Reyes. Super favorite Filipino romance author ko talaga siya. The way she puts fields of study is so, pa’no ba, captivating? I am such a sucker for scientific and mathematical jargon used in novels. Natigil nga lang ang pagbabasa ko because of the editing work.

Sana sunod-sunod na. One Wattpad novel, one published novel. Please, kayanin mo, self.

Own Writing

Gusto ko lang sabihin na I’m proud of myself for finishing an English novella. It was my first time to write that way. Nakakapurga ng brain cells. Hahaha! I mean, I usually write in English, but I’m really more comfortable writing in Tagalog when it comes to my novels. But I wanted it to be as romantic as it could, just like how Six de los Reyes would do it. Hehe (sobrang lodi). I tried my best. My beta readers liked it, but I still have to wait for an announcement if this project will push through.

Sabi naman, it will.

Also, rainbows! I’m excited for this. Sana kaya. Sana maging successful. I’m anxious about it, really. Tibok is inspired by my lesbian friends, the movies I’ve watched, the storied I’ve read, my own experience, and many more. Matagal ko na gustong magsulat ng gano’n, to be honest. But people know me as a teen fic writer, at takot ako na baka mamaya, may mali akong masulat or it would come off as awkward. That’s why I’m super happy to have lesbian and bisexual readers read it and say they could relate to Kayi’s and Kabi’s struggles. Kasi para sa atin talaga ‘yon. I hope I was able to represent them well, and ngayon pa lang, I’m thankful for my wlw readers. I’ll be writing maybe two more wlw: a short story and a fantasy novel. Sana, sana!

I also started writing All That Poison again. Nakakatuwa when readers find the Easter eggs! Ganito pala feeling ni Taylor Swift. Haha! Like, it’s not required that you find them, but they’re there, waiting to be discovered. Super cool that I have STEM and pre-med readers who know what I’m talking about. It’s scary hahaha because I had to research about these things for a week.

Siyempre, Tossed Coin. I miss Cherry, Gab, Jet, and Anya. At grabe, the memories I have this person rushed like a flood. Diyahe that debut scene. Do I really have to write it word per word? Nakakaloka ang eighteen-year-old self ko? Hahaha. Ito rin ang katangahan ko, e. I immortalized a person I want to forget. Sinong tanga? Para akong ‘yong mga characters ko. Nakakagigil.

Ang daming nakapila. I want to start them naaaaa, but I have to be patient. Hindi rin kasi ako kumportable na marami akong ipopst and then get overwhelmed. Isa-isa lang.

Write on your own pace and remember your why, Peach. I love you. (Kilig ako. Hahaha. Yes, I should really do that more often.)

Fangirling Over Artists on Twitter . . . and Halsey

Iyon lang. I also fangirl over a lot of artists lately. It started with Hunghang Flashbacks and Malayo Pa Ang Umaga. And because they also retweet good stuff, I was able to know many artists. Kaya perfect talaga si Aiden, e, because I’ve always admired artists since I was a kid. I’ve accepted the fact that I can’t be one hahaha! I can’t apply shadow properly (I suck at it so much!)

Also, MPAU’s posts are scary af. Alam ko namang I’m a sissy, but when it comes to art, favorite ko ang gore and horror. Haha, labo ko.

Lagi na lang ako frustrated. Frustrated dancer. Frustrated singer. Frustrated artist. Sabi nga nila, a jack of all trades. But whatever. I want to be my own queen. I’ll practice and practice and do these things using the best of my abilities. Recognition is just a bonus. Gusto ko lang talaga sumaya at maging kuntento sa sarili ko.

And yes, stan Halsey!

 

This is how I cope with the quarantine. I try to make myself busy (also, wala rin akong choice because it’s my work), away from the stress that is the national government. I stopped commenting because, ewan, I lost hope on them already. Kaya rin siguro I made an alter acct kasi sometimes the anger gets too overwhelming that, you know, I still need to type it away because it’s how I cope. But yes, I’m still mad. Raging mad.

It has been fifty days, mga par, but I don’t think we’re ready to leave our houses and just go back to normal on May 15. Basta, until the end, I’ll put empathy in mind.

 

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