Am Anxious and Can’t Breathe Properly and Angered by My Father

So you see, I’m at home, trying to continue my novel. Pero nakaramdam ako na hirap ako mag-swallow. Tiningnan ko ‘yong salamin and found that my tonsil is leaning to one side. Tapos parang may bumps sa tongue ko.

And I have been coughing since Tuesday.

Last na labas ko was Monday to have coffee at Starbucks at Sierra Valley, Cainta. After that, inubo ako. Dry cough. Then I felt light-headed a day after. And chills, but not to the point of high fever. And all of these were symptoms of COVID.

I have asthma, you see. And I’m living in a COVID-infected town. My anxiety isn’t helping me, and I can only hope that I don’t have it. I just want to get antibiotics or something. I immediately gargled warm water with salt and tried to convince my younger brother to bring me to thr ER because, kung wala akong virus, this may be a sign of allergy and I am afraid of losing oxygen. Pero wala naman akong kinakain na hipon.

Again, my anxiety isn’t helping.

But then my father kept shouting, “Uminom ka kasi ng apple cider!” Minsan napapa-what the fuck na lang ako. Saan na naman niya ‘to nakuha? Here’s a credible source debunking that myth: https://www.uq.edu.au/news/article/2020/03/coronavirus-claims-checked-experts

And you know what he’s doing now? He’s checking up on somebody else’s health. Napaka-ironic.

These are the times I wish my mom were still alive. I know she will prioritze me. I know she will take immediate action. Oh my god, Ma, kunin mo na ako.

But then again di ko pa natatapos ‘yong nobela ko so baka ‘wag muna. Joke lang, Ma.

I just have to let this out. It’s just hard to breathe.

5 thoughts on “Am Anxious and Can’t Breathe Properly and Angered by My Father

  1. Omg ate 🥺 Napainom tuloy ako ng tubig, biglang nag-dry yung throat ko sa nabasa ko ahdkshd. Di ka pa nagpapa-check up? 🤧 Pa-check up na ikawwww.

    Like

      1. Wala, dear. Tubig-tubig lang. 😦 Sana mawala na. Nakakulong naman ako sa kuwarto just in case (well, lagi naman akong nasa loob ng kuwarto ko haha).

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Haha. Pero sana ‘te mawala na. Pagpe-pray sana kita kaso di ako malakas kay Lord eh lol kaya cheer na lang kita. Fight, Ate Peach! Kaya mo yan! ᕙ(⇀‸↼‶)ᕗ

        Like

What are your thoughts?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.